Immigrant Insiders

Immigrants are still fitting in.

Still fitting in?

This is Miriam Jordan’s argument in response to Congress’ alleged failure to fix the current immigration laws and solve our nation’s illegal immigration problem. She thinks that Congress’ repeated attempts to deal with immigrants, both legal and illegal, suggest that the people and policies of the United States are poorly assimilating these people to the mainstream American culture.

Jordan, who’s article was published in the Wall Street Journal this past Monday, believes otherwise.

from gerson721 

Jordan presents statistics showing immigrants are assimilating to the United States faster than their counterparts who are trying to adapt to the cultures in other Western countries, such as Austria, France, and Switzerland. She also mentions factors related to speed of assimilation, including owning a home, having the ability to speak English, and achieving U.S. citizenship.

These factors shape the way Americans view immigrants – and in my opinion, immigrants who have accomplished these tasks are less likely to be seen as “outsiders” and are more accepted by the natives. Having this feeling of acceptance by the already acculturated citizens of America makes assimilating to the culture much easier. There is one less hurdle to jump over, one less challenge to overcome.

Immigrants who are no longer on the outside don’t have to worry about not fitting in – it might take some time to achieve to full assimilation, but because insiders have already accepted them and seen them as not just outsiders or aliens, they can rest assured they will get there eventually.

And the only reason these immigrants are no longer seen as outsiders is because they are adopting the native culture, striving to become more like the mainstream American.

They are conforming.

By conforming to these norms, American’s are prompted to grant immigrants insider status.

Immigrants are accepted. They are no longer classified and treated as aliens.

Immigrants must sacrifice their native culture and traditions in order to assimilate to the American culture. These actions have major consequences, as explained by Jordan. She writes that the ability to assimilate has economic implications, affecting job markets, government budgets, education, and hospital emergency rooms. Although Jordan makes no indication as to whether these effects are positive or negative, the current state of our economy points to negative. So the bottom line is that immigrants are being forced to conform to gain acceptance. They are sacrificing their native culture in hopes being an insider in a society filled with economic downturn.

So is fitting in really a good thing?

To Kill Creativity

To continue with the topic of last week’s post…

I have established the fact that I had been somewhat unconsciously and culturally steered onto my career path. But why wasn’t I able to come up with a profession that is unique? Something that would encompass my love for dancing hula with a more practical side to it would have been ideal.

Where has my creativity gone??

With this thought in mind, I decided to search YouTube for thoughts about creativity in today’s youth. Many people in America strive for “American” traits, which include independence and uniqueness. For one to be able to emulate these traits, I believe creativity is also necessary. So it makes sense that we must instill creativity in America’s youth.

Sir Ken Robinson has a different opinion on the matter.

At the TED Conference a few years ago, Robinson told audiences that creativity is as important as literacy. An illiterate America would never be considered one of the most powerful countries in the world. An America that lacks creative individuals would result in the same. Robinson believes that our American school systems are “educating people out of their creative capacities,” owing this to students’ fears of being punished for being wrong. He says, “if [students] are not prepared to be wrong, [they] will never come up with anything original,” and that by the time these students grow into adulthood, this fear of being wrong will translate into a complete loss of creative capacity.

The school systems tend to stigmatize mistakes. Sure, there is no such thing as a “stupid question,” but the other students will inevitably giggle and smirk at the kid who asks the “stupid question.” No one wants to be that kid.

By the way Sir Ken Robinson lays out his argument, it looks like creativity doesn’t stand a chance.

Granted, there are many creative people coming out of the American school system. Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Martin Luther King, Jr., and Lady Gaga are all visionaries in my mind. But perhaps Robinson is correct. If the American school system is stifling creativity, there should many more creative geniuses walking our streets.

What implications does this lack of creativity have on our economy and our image as a nation? By lacking creativity are we slowing shifting toward conformity? This is just something to think about…  

So why do you want to become a pharmacist?

“So, why do you want to become a pharmacist?”

This tends to be the follow up question to my declaration of being a pre-pharmacy student. I can’t even remember how many times I’ve been asked this simple and predictable question. But despite the numerous opportunities I have had to practice my answer, I still have yet to formulate a response that is completely truthful and accurate. Every time someone asks, my heart beats a little faster. I tend to make things up. My answer always changes. All because I don’t actually know the answer.

My future... 

Why do I want to become a pharmacist? Is it merely because I can’t see myself as a physician, lawyer, or businesswoman?

Possibly.

Sometimes I feel like the only reason I chose pharmacy as a future career is because it was one of a limited amount of “approved” professions as dictated by my family. Against my own beliefs, I found myself subliminally conforming to their expectations! And I hadn’t become aware of this decision until I was too far into my education to switch career goals.

I mean if it was up to me, I would still be living in Hawaii, dancing hula along side Mickey and Minnie at the new Disney Resort at Ko`olina. In this fictitious world, one where world peace existed and no one was poor or hungry, I would be a professional hula dancer. But such a world does not exist. And professional hula dancing career would only take off if my family saw this as a suitable and appropriate occupation. 

This, however, is not the case. And the more practical me realizes that this would not be a sustainable way to support my future family or myself. But to be able to turn my passion into a career…

So if not hula dancing, why pharmacy? It’s most likely because I have been brainwashed to think that there are only a handful of “real” jobs in this world. It turns out that my options were severely limited from the get go.

There are still so many other professions out there that I have not even really heard about, let alone had the time to seriously consider as a career. Why is it that the only “acceptable” careers are those that are labeled “pre-professional” – that is pre-med, pre-law, pre-dental, etc? As the daughter of two successful accountants, business was another sensible route. I’ve gotten my fair share of speeches about the benefits of going to business school and starting off my career working long, arduous hours as an employee of one of the “Big 4.”

But why were these the only options? Why haven’t I had the time to think of other career paths besides these?

Or maybe it wasn’t that I didn’t have the time, but rather I was brought up to think that there were only certain professions that are considered acceptable – only certain professions would make my parents proud of me. Science or business. My parents were making the process of choosing a career easier on me, ensuring that my future would be bright. They had my back; they were looking out for me.

I’m not saying that the idea of becoming a pharmacist isn’t appealing to me. I think I have grown into the idea of making this my profession. But would I have been a more enthusiastic sculptor, paleontologist, or social worker? By conforming to my parents expectations, I may never know. 

Down with Galinda!

Good news of the week: my friend just got two tickets for us to see Wicked when they come to Los Angeles!

I have wanted to see Wicked since my high school graduating class sang For Good during the finale of our senior Variety Show. And I am finally getting my chance!

Being the prepared person that I am (but mostly due to the fact that I’m so excited to see this famous Broadway show), I found myself searching through YouTube’s vast library for clips of Wicked on Broadway. Defying Gravity and For Good were obvious musical selections, and I listened to each more than five times. Yes, they are THAT amazing.

I decided to broaden my horizons and search for other Stephen Schwartz pieces in Wicked, when I came across Popular. As in the other two songs, these singers had amazing voices. I was mesmerized to the point where I could only focus on the clarity of their sound rather than the lyrics of the song. But during round two of Popular, I began to key in on Galinda’s arrogant and egotistical attitude.

At this point in the plot, Galinda is trying to get Elphaba to be her “new project”. And just what does this entail?

Galinda wants to change Elphaba’s look and personality in an attempt to make Elphaba as popular as she is. According the Galinda, Elphaba is “less fortunate”, which of naturally triggers Galinda’s good-natured self to give Elphaba a complete makeover.

But this is no ordinary makeover – not like the ones you see on the Style channel.

Galinda sings, “Don’t be offended by my frank analysis. Think of it as a personality dialysis.”

A PERSONALITY DIALYSIS?!?

What kind of blunt, insensitive jargon is this?

Dialysis, from what I know as an undergraduate biology major, involves removing toxins and other unwanted macromolecules from a medium, such as blood. A “personality dialysis” seems to imply that Galinda wants to rid Elphaba’s personality of toxins, brining her one step closer to becoming popular.

Not only does this sound unethical and downright rude, but also Elphaba’s personality is what makes her such an interesting character! She is unique and still likable as a character in Wicked because her personality is so different from Galinda’s. But in Galinda’s world, Elphaba is merely an outsider, someone who yearns to be popular in the same context and within the same guidelines as Galinda.

Galinda further clarifies that “it’s not about aptitude, it’s the way you’re viewed” that determines one’s popularity. So not only does Elphaba have to change her personality, she has to change her appearance as well.

I couldn’t believe what I was reading. Galinda should join Big Bird in their similar attempts to make everyone the same.

Sadly, even in mythical worlds, like the Land of Oz, influential characters promote conformity to a norm that is more accepted and admired. Now I wait the next two months to see Wicked, which were previously overflowing with anxious excitement, but are now filled with tainted images of Wicked’s characters. 

It's not all that Glamorous

Social media is out there. Everywhere. It will attract you and it will trap you. There will be no means of escape. It has the ability to dictate what is appropriate. And for some reason, many of us cannot help but conform to these unwritten rules.

Today I will take a new angle on the issue of conformity. Instead of focusing on how ethnic culture impacts our decision to conform, I will look at how social culture seems to control us like puppets, making us bend our unique styles toward an ideal beauty that is sometimes too extravagant and unrealistic to obtain.

In one Huffington post article, Celebrity Fit: Hollywood Skinny and Sample Sizes, Leona Palmer writes about the challenges that our present day A-list actresses face. The happy, beautiful women we see gracing the covers of Lucky, Vogue, and Marie Claire are not all glitz and glamour. They had to work hard to get into those tiny, thousand dollar dresses.

Why don’t they just make a bigger size for these rich and famous celebs, you ask?

Palmer explains that most of these dresses are one-of-a-kind – the designer makes one dress and fits it to a runway model. So when celebs try to sport it for a magazine cover, often times, it just won’t fit. Dresses have to be tailored, seams ripped, panels of fabric added. All in all, the whole process is just embarrassing!

But it shouldn’t be.

Why should these celebrities, already known amongst the public for their beautiful faces and hot bodies, have to feel the need to fit into a Barbie doll sized dress? On top of everything going on in their busy lives, it seems unnecessary for those in the fashion industry to expect these actresses to be “fashion-model skinny”. I mean, is slimming down going to improve the public’s perception of their already perfect bodies?

And where does that leave us – the normal folk? If we expect celebrities to be even skinnier than they already are, does that mean society will also feel the stress of slimming down even further? Is this what is takes to be successful in the fashion and entertainment industries?

Granted, America, as a nation, is battling obesity, but eating disorders are still extremely prevalent. I’m not trying to say that all eating disorders stem from the desire to mimic Hollywood’s best and brightest stars. But social media has a way of impacting our society like no other. The newest fashion trends spread quickly and we always know the latest celebrity gossip whether we want to or not. We just so happen to live in a world that idolizes these people, and their image is constantly forced upon us so much so that sometimes it seems as if there is no way to escape the desire to conform to this image.

In a world that is gradually shifting toward sameness, I hope we find a way to escape. 

My Attempt to “Think Different”

Since the death of Steve Jobs exactly one week ago, thousands of people have written about his amazing accomplishments. Many of these articles focus on Jobs’ business success as the CEO of Apple, Inc., but one Canadian news article asks us to think of him not as a corporate visionary, but instead, remember Jobs as a cultural visionary.

Steve Jobs’ worldwide cultural impact started with a simple slogan: “Think Different.”

Apple’s 1997 TV advertisement is simple, showing black and white images of people who need no introduction. Albert Einstein, Martin Luther King, Jr., Muhammed Ali, Mahatma Gandhi, and the like grace the screen. We all know their power. We all know of their significant contributions to the world.

According to the ad, these people represent misfits and rebels. The narrator describes them as “round pegs in square holes”. According to the ad, they are neither fond of rules nor the status quo. But they cannot be ignored. These influential individuals changed the world and push the human race forward.

I think it is safe to say that, at one point or another in our lives, we have looked up to one or more of the people featured in this ad. We have glorified them, admired their accomplishments, and hoped that one day we could achieve even half of what they have. And if their success is dictated by their ability to “think different” like Apple says, then I would be crazy to not follow suit!

Obviously, none of the influential icons shown in the ad used Apple products to garner their power. Einstein didn’t use a Macintosh to come up with the theory of relativity. Martin Luther King Jr. didn’t write his “I have a dream” speech on his iPad. Yet, Apple is essentially saying that if you want to amazing human beings be like Albert Einstein and Martin Luther King Jr., buy Apple products!

And we did.

We succumbed to Apple consumerism in an effort to “think different.” If you purchased and flaunted an Apple product, you embraced “different”. You labeled yourself as unique.

But how unique are you, when 99% of the people around you are also using Apple products? I personally do not know of anyone in my generation who has never listened to music on an iPod, never organized their growing music library on iTunes, never typed an email or Word document on a Mac.

I won’t lie. I, too, am a consumer of Apple – I am typing this blog post on my MacBook while listening to music on my iTunes library (and my iPod Touch is less than twelve inches away). I am all for different and unique, yet by purchasing these products, I have somehow conformed to the norm of Apple consumerism.

How did this happen?

In our quest to think different, have we all become the same? This does not only apply to our love of Apple technology, but all cultural icons that make us all want to be a certain way.

We think of ourselves as belonging to an individualist culture. We refuse to conform and try to be as independent as possible. Uniqueness is embraced. Sameness is boring. You get the picture. Yet in terms of technology, by striving to be different, we have somehow all arrived at the same point.

A point of sameness. 

フラガール Hula Girls!!

As I looked through Google News to find my source of inspiration for this post, I saw an article announcing Steve Jobs’ unfortunate death, one regarding Sarah Palin’s decision to bow out of the presidential race, and (under more specific search constraints) an article about a group of Japanese women who just completed a national tour of 125 cities throughout Japan. Because of the recent earthquake and resulting tsunami in Japan, I assumed this tour was aimed at disaster relief. You know, the standard raising awareness, bringing the country together, etc. And I was correct. But just how these women provided belief was much to my surprise.

Instead of extending their undoubtedly warm Japanese hospitality – meek smiles, sympathetic words, nods of agreement and understanding, and of course, many bows – they danced hula.

These women represent a group hired to dance at the Spa Resort Hawaiian in Iwaki, which was closed due to damage from the earthquake. During the closure they danced their way through Japan, providing their fellow countrymen with relief at evacuation shelters and encouraging them to lend support to Fukushima. As the article describes, they were always greeted with warmly, often with tears of joy and appreciation.

That’s right, a group of Japanese nationals performing the dance of native Hawaiians in front of thousands of people in Japan – talk about going against the grain.

So how would Amy Chua, the controversial Tiger Mom representative, view these women and their hula dancing?

Her view of how Asians should act, which is a direct result of their strict upbringing, leaves no room for dancing hula. Or should I say, no dancing, in general. Maybe Chua would make an exception if the dance were traditional and race-concordant. An activity aiming to perpetuate culture would seemingly be okay in her book, as long as participation did not mean sacrificing education. But dancing hula as an Asian, or even as an Asian American, is unacceptable.

Like the Chua’s native China, Japan is supposed to represent a collectivist culture – everyone blends in with each other. No one wants to stick out and be the oddball. No one wants to be considered different. So how do these Japanese girls maintain their own cultural identity while taking on another culture’s identity so effortlessly and with such poise? How is it that they have found acceptance within themselves and from their countrymen to be unique in this one aspect?

Like them, I am a product of East Asia, passionate about an art form that doesn’t represent my culture. The difference between us is I look less “Japanese-y” than them due to my local, Asian, immigrant-working-on-the-Hawaiian-plantation relatives. Yet despite my closer tie to the Hawaiian culture, it seems I lack their confidence in performing what we both consider to be our passion.

These hula girls of Iwaki are standing out and making themselves known for doing something that is atypical. Dancing hula makes them unique, a trait some would associate with Western cultures and Americans. Thus, they are actively choosing not to conform to the stereotypes of East Asians.

Hats off to them! I am proud and comforted knowing that I am not the only hula-loving Japanese and I aim to be as confident as they are when going against the grain.

Who cares about conforming to the stereotypes of our race?!

Tiger-esque Mom

A tiger mom is defined as, “a mother that is extremely stereotypically Asian”, who “beats their children, demands high grades, bargains at the dollar store, and will only give their children money during Chinese New Year”, according to UrbanDicitonary.com.

Amy Chua, a self-proclaimed tiger mom, discusses why Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids in her Wall Street Journal article (taken as an excerpt from her book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom). She says that children of Chinese parents are never allowed to “attend a sleepover, be in a school play, watch TV or play computer games, get any grade less than an A, choose their own extracurricular activities, or play any instrument other than the piano or violin”, just to name a few. Amy Chua rants about these tiger mom traits mockingly, yet her stories reinforce this list of attributes. And she never denies any of these claims.

Society has come to recognize tiger moms as an embodiment of extreme (and some might say inappropriate) parenting. To an unknowing outsider, tiger moms seem uncaring and irrational, cynical and totally not fun. But from the mothers’ perspective, their actions exemplify tough love.

That’s right. It’s all about love.

They love and care for their children so they refuse let them be anything but the best – they are willing to sacrifice anything for their children’s success. When their children get discouraged, tiger moms do not necessarily provide encouragement. Rather they deny their children of the chance to quit.

Originally, this is where I was going to transition into discussing my own tiger mom and her tactics to making me conform to all the other perfect Asian-American children. I was going to write that sometimes, especially in my middle school, adolescent years, I felt suffocated; but in the cliché, happy-ending sort of way, I knew in my heart that she acted this way because she loved me.

But I couldn’t write this. I realized that my mom was not tiger-esque in the Amy Chua-Urban Dictionary sense. Thus, I have no right calling her a tiger mom.

Yes, my Chinese mom expects me to get good grades, practice my viola, go into a respectable profession, and be a loyal daughter. And for the most part, I have succumbed her careful molding.

She pushed. And I gave in.

But there came a point in my life when time would not allow me to be in two places at once – I was forced to choose being a violist in the Hawaii Youth Symphony or dancing in the Hula `Oni E Hula Competition with my halau. Of course, my mom wanted me to maintain my position as one of the talented, hand-picked individuals in our state’s youth orchestra – after all, it would look much better on a college resume. Of course, I wanted to dance hula – after all, it is my passion.

I was adamant about my decision. I (respectfully) pushed. And she gave in.

Obviously, my mom is not tiger mom material, and for that I am grateful. She allowed me to make my own choices and learn by making my own mistakes. She allowed me to pursue my passion and maintain a large part of my identity. And by advocating for my identity, I was able to avoid conforming into the stereotypical Asian-American child.

I’m not saying that you need to defy our moms whenever possible. That would be extremely rude. But there are pressures around us that are trying to change the way you act, change the way you look, and change your interests. So when it comes to matters of identity, it is important to remember what makes you, you.   

I found my match on citeulike.com - Sept. 2011

Social Bookmarking Soulmate Post

After going through scores of social bookmarking fanatics, I began to give up hope. I would never find my social bookmarking soul mate. Was there not a single person out there who shared my curiosity about conformity and its affect on identity? I couldn’t believe it.

Using Delicious, Citeulike, and Stumbledupon, I searched and searched. I spotted some hopefuls, but no one worthy of the label of being my soul mate. Through Citeulike.com I found Elenaa. She tagged articles using the keywords I was searching for. With a mere six articles in her library, Elenaa she lacked the breadth and substance I was looking for in this relationship.

I admit I was narrow minded when searching for social bookmarkers. I mainly searched for articles tagged with ‘conformity’ and ‘identity’. You could say I was not willing to meet my soul mate halfway – I wanted this social bookmarker to present him/herself to me. I thank my lucky stars that despite my ignorance, I was able to come across Djcurly. Her interests seemed vaguely similar to mine.

You could say I was settling by allowing Djcurly to be my soul mate. It wasn’t love at first sight, but I gave her a chance.

She surprised me.

With a library of 115 articles, Djcurly possessed the substance I was looking for. These articles were tagged with key words such as, “conformity”, “group emotion”, “emotion perception”, “prejudice”, and “self-categorization”. She also seems to have many articles dealing with abortion. Glancing at her repertoire of articles, I convinced myself that she was gradually earning her title of “social bookmarking soul mate”.

Djcurly posted 115 posts from 2007 to 2010, averaging about three to four posts per month. Her tags are very well organized – there isn’t an article in her library that doesn’t contain at least one tag. And actually, most contain multiple tags making it almost effortless to determine the purpose of the article. It appears that she has commented on some of the articles she posted but these are private and hidden from my view. However, I am able to see a one-to-five star rating (five stars indicating a “Top priority!”) Djcurly has applied to each of her articles.            

Under the tag, “conformity”, Djcurly bookmarked an article by Packer that examines the difference between group members who choose not to conform to the norm and do so by distancing themselves from the group, and those who choose not to conform in order to challenge or change the norm. Packer gives perspective on the various motivations behind defying the normative behavior. In my first post I explain that I go against the norm because that is where my passion lies. In Packer’s terms, I am most likely choosing not to conform by distancing myself from my “group”.

Under the tag, “identity”, Djcurly bookmarked an article by Ellemers, et al. that examines the different conditions under which “self” and “identity” are affected by the groups we associate ourselves with. It describes the “personal self” vs. the “collective self”, and the connection between our social identity and the commitment to the groups we belong to. Ellemers also brings up the interesting concept of self-stereotyping. They discuss the convenient nature of stereotyping and the idea of self-stereotyping, which authors indicate as the perception of seeing yourself as similar the group so that you may remain as part of the group. Such ideas of the personal vs. collective self and our social identity may be topics I wish to explore in future blog posts. I could write about how my personal self seems to differ from my collective self. However, this may be steering too far from the psychological approach I am aiming to take, and more towards a philosophical approach.

Djcurly provides an academic perspective to my blog readers. In my blog, I write about my experiences about feeling like an outsider because of my lack of interest in conforming. Djcurly’s tagged articles describe the potential psychological reasoning behind my decision. Because my academic background is rooted in the sciences, it is comforting to know that there is experimental evidence to back up some of my actions.  

Trio - Paper #1

Hello, World Post

A Stand Against Big Bird

http://www.flickr.com/photos/luisrubio/

“One of these things is not like the other. One of these things just doesn’t belong. Can you tell which thing is not like the others by the time I finish my song?” – Big Bird, Sesame Street

Why are creators of Sesame Street persistently instilling in us an eye for picking out the oddball?

By Big Bird’s command, we were obliged to identify differences, and identify them quickly, while we were still in diapers. We were tested on disparities in shape, size, color, number, and object. And what was our reward? Nothing tangible that would be of value to any three year old. We were merely left with the self-admiration that came with recognizing the oddball before the music stopped and our time expired. We were gratified by the creation of conformity. And that was enough for us. But is Sesame Street teaching our youngsters a valuable trait? Is the ability to detect the thing that has yet to conform a necessity?

Sesame Street teaches children the skill of identifying differences amongst things and people, which could lead to the conclusion that different is bad; and this young, impressionable, audience may develop a negative perception of things that look unusual. But we should embrace what is different and not be made uncomfortable by it. We should aim to preserve that which is different instead of throwing it out.

Big Bird’s trademark yellow feathers should be painted red. Shame on him.

As a mixed-breed of Asian ethnicities, I have experience feeling like “one of these things that just doesn’t belong” when I dance hula.

This native Hawaiian art form has been my passion for the past fifteen years. I love using my hands, feet, and expressions to tell a story about the beautiful places, astounding events, and influential people of this isolated archipelago. Yet I am the outsider, a foreigner, a haole.

Standing next to my hula sisters, I cannot help but compare my long, straight hair with their wavy locks. I cannot help but notice that my eyes turn into crescent moons on the surface of my face when I smile, while theirs remain whole and round. But I move just as gracefully as they move, I am as good a dancer as they are, and I love hula just as much as they do.

The only difference: I lack Hawaiian blood and the traits that come with it. I am physically different. I am an outsider.

Among the other girls, I would be the object Big Bird would identify as the oddball – the one that Big Bird would point to at the end of the song and announce as the discrepancy amongst the rest. Yet, despite the uncomfortable feeling this revelation sometimes causes, time and time again, I decide to stick with hula.

I cannot be intimidated by my physical differences, and I cannot abandon my passion.

Dancing hula is part of my identity. In that world I am unique, not just the “cookie-cutter” Asian girl (academically inclined, sweet, soft-spoken, respectful of her culture, etc.). When I dance hula, I am a foreigner amongst the natives, but I am proud.

And so I constantly remind myself, in a cliché, motivational-speaker-style manner, that in situations where I am uncomfortable being seen as the outsider, I must hold strong to the idea that this is, instead, an opportunity to preserve the thing about me that make me unique. That is, I must ignore intimidation and be proud of being me.

This blog is for those of us who are unique, who are outsiders, and who are proud of being us.

So let’s take a stand against Big Bird!

Profile Post:

A Wedding Blog?

Have I really found my blogging companion in a wedding blog? I was happily surprised to find this to be true.

Think Splendid is a blog dedicated to the business behind wedding and event planning. Liene Stevens, the author of this blog, runs Splendid Communications, a “digital marketing firm specialized in the wedding and event industries”. She sees blogging as a form of old-fashioned conversations, as opposed to a way of keeping up with the latest trends. Stevens uses this blog not only to discuss business ideas, but also to talk about people – what drives us and moves us, and what we know we are all thinking but are too afraid to vocalize.

http://www.fotopedia.com/users/scientik

And that’s where I found our connection. It was like a forbidden love. Coming from two different worlds, our blogs were never supposed to meet. But as fate would have it, she had me at her first post.

In a post titled, Waiting for the Rinse Cycle to Complete, Stevens warns her audience that “social media doesn’t turn a person into a hero or a fraud; it amplifies who they already are”. She writes that the truth about a person’s personality will come out in due time – there is no point in trying to hide it. Although this piece is short, taking up a mere four lines of text, each word resonates.  And you can picture her saying this standing akimbo, the expression of seriousness worn professionally on her face. She means what she says.

Still, how does this post relate to my blog?

True, there is a lack of direct correlation, but her post made me reflect on my writing – I felt the need to re-evaluate the purpose of my own blog. If I am going to be discussing something that I am already so passionate about, will this medium of communication really amplify my feelings and make my stories and opinions seem too over the top? I don't want to make a mountain out of a molehill. Stevens’ post reminded me that I need to keep myself in check when writing, or else fall victim to becoming an “oddball, on steroids”, as one of her followers would put it.

Stevens also made me reflect on the (possible) difference between two seemingly synonymous words.

In Being Yourself, Stevens makes the distinction between what is means to be “different” and what it means to be “unique”. In true, inspiring-sermon, shouting-from-the-pulpit fashion, she claims, “different is temporary and easy to duplicate”, whereas, “unique is you”. Others can mimic the things about you that are different, but they can never be you.

Truly, a nice sentiment. But do I really need to take these two words as seriously as she?

I pondered my own interchangeable use of the words “different” and “unique” in Hello, World. Though I understand her word usage argument, I will stick to what I wrote. The focuses of our posts are different, even though we end with the similar opinions. I use my own stories to explain why I am different (or unique, as Stevens would say) and that people who are different should be proud of what makes them unlike everyone else, whereas Stevens argues that everyone should aim to be unique.

Stevens obviously does an incredible job of making her readers reflect on their own lives.

These blog posts, tagged as topics of “Personal Development”, represent two of many posts on Think Splendid. At first glance, I could not quite grasp why Stevens would blog about such issues when her site clearly deals with her wedding business. But after reading some of her blog posts, I came to the conclusion that she writes these to remind herself to avoid getting lost in all the hustle and bustle of the wedding industry.

Although her blog is mostly professional and her examples and stories apply to her business, she writes in a way so that the reader can ignore the technicalities of her examples and make these lessons applicable to their own lives.

Likewise, I want to share some of my own experiences as an Asian hula dancer who doesn’t fit in with my native Hawaiian counterparts, and I want people reading my blog to find a way to connect to my story even though they most likely won’t share my experiences.

Voice Post:

Holly’s Words to the Wise

You would think there would be at least a handful of blogs out on the web that cover topics similar to mine. At least, that’s what I thought when I wrote my first post. I envisioned a whole group of people who felt like they didn’t fit in, all coming together in little cyber communities to discuss their experiences.

I was wrong.

But then I found Holly Bacchus.

I found a blogger who writes about issues similar to mine. Needless to say, I was excited. But as I read post after post, I found myself questioning Holly’s credentials – who was she telling me how I should act? I became slightly defensive. Holly’s confident (to the point of being bossy) “voice” caused my reaction and made me realize that this was something I would want to avoid in my writing.

Right off the bat, I was hit with a one-sentence paragraph around which Holly structures her entire post. This introduction sentence-paragraph is forceful and convincing – I had no choice but to agree with her. After all, who could disagree with a sentence like, “Bullying is a bitch”, especially when written in bold lettering?

Holly tends to use these short, punchy sentences throughout her pieces, which give off a sense of confidence. She claims, very matter-of-factly, that people who are “different” will one day “rule the world”. She quickly adds, “Here’s why”, as if anticipating my curiosity or objection. With not a moment to spare, she explains her reasoning without giving me a chance to come up with an argument. Her rebuttal comes out fast and strong, and I am given no choice but to agree with her logic.

In this moment, I get the feeling that Holly is bossy – she cannot accept any opinion but her own, so she doesn’t allow the reader any time to formulate an ideas that contrasts hers.

These short, confident sentences also convey seriousness. The subjects Holly discusses (i.e. getting bullied for being different, not fitting in, etc.) are matters she doesn’t take lightly; and her voice complements the seriousness of these issues. Holly has opinions about how people should act, and had I been doing otherwise, I would feel guilty about my actions. Holly just has that effect.

Holly’s consistent use of conjunctions at the beginning of sentences adds to this perception of her dominating attitude. She often starts sentences, and even paragraphs, with words like “and” and “but”. She even goes so far as to begin a sentence with “because”, violating every rule about writing ingrained in us since the third grade. Beginning sentences with words that tend to come in the middle of a sentence call to my attention. They are red flags – discreet orders requiring my full attention in the next few seconds.

Holly waves many red flags.

Despite my desire to refrain from emulating Holly’s bossy demeanor, there are aspects of her voice that make her blog less intimidating. Yes, Holly has a welcoming side.

These blog posts seem very casual and relaxed, but not colloquial, written as if she were a college student giving a lecture to her peers. Holly refrains from using words or phrases that make her blog sound academic. Instead, she uses her own jargon, including words like, “kooky”, “weirdness”, and “urbane sophisticate”. I realize this last term can seem a bit academic, but she uses it mockingly, which brings us back to her laid-back attitude. She also uses grammatically incorrect sentences and sentence fragments, such as, “It feels real good”, and, “What a sick and pathetic display”, reinforcing the casualness of her  writing.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/rakka/

Holly is also able to create imagery while remaining informal when she says,

“No longer is being the strange one a sentence for a lonely life with many, many cats.”

I was able to visualize the stereotypical old, unmarried lady surrounded by cats in her tiny, musty home immediately; and yes, I thought she was strange. Holly also writes,

“I found myself swimming upstream, often without any sort of boat, or even water wings.”

After reading the first half of this sentence, I got a feeling that Holly was saying something inspirational – like something you might hear in a sermon; but when she references water wings, I instantly pictured neon colored inflatables, causing the seriousness of this image to dissipate. Holly’s voice remains consistent - when she writes something that could be construed as professional, she manages to bring it down a few notches.

Lastly, Holly uses punctuation to accent her casual, non-academic speaking voice. The reader can essentially hear her speak to them when she says, “Don’t. Drink. Beer” (I envision hand gestures and a very serious expression), and see her take a second to gather her thoughts when she writes ellipses in the middle of a sentence.

Holly’s voice is multi-faceted – there are some elements that I wish to emulate, and some I can do without. She is bossy and confident, preaching her words-to-the-wise to anyone who will listen; yet she manages to remain casual when discussing serious issues, which ultimately caught my attention and drew me into her blog. Thank you for this lesson in voice, Holly.   

Holly's Words to the Wise

So who is Holly Bacchus? She is a punchy and confident woman who chooses to go against the grain, acknowledge the qualities that make her unique, and says whatever comes to mind. And how do I know this? I actually don’t; I merely base all my assumptions about her personality on the voice in her writing.

Right off the bat, the reader is hit with a one-sentence paragraph around which Holly structures her entire post. This introduction sentence-paragraph is forceful and convincing – the reader has no choice but to agree with her. I for one am not going to disagree with a sentence like, “Bullying is a bitch”, especially when written in bolded lettering.

Holly tends to use these short, punchy sentences throughout her pieces, which give off a sense of confidence. She claims, very matter-of-factly, that people who are “different” will one day “rule the world”. She quickly adds, “Here’s why”, as if anticipating the reader’s curiosity or objection, and then explains her reasoning, giving the reader no time to form an argument. Her rebuttal comes out strong, and the reader is given no choice but to agree with her logic. In this particular moment, I get the sense that Holly is bossy – she cannot accept any opinion but her own. She doesn’t allow the reader any time to formulate an opinion that contrasts hers. These short, confident sentences also convey seriousness. The subjects Holly discusses (i.e. getting bullied for being different, not fitting in, etc.) are matters she doesn’t take lightly; and her voice complements the seriousness of these issues. Holly has opinions about how people should act, and as the reader, if you find yourself doing otherwise, she will make you feel guilty about your actions.

Holly’s consistent use of conjunctions at the beginning of sentences adds to this perception of Holly’s dominating attitude. She often starts sentences, and even paragraphs, with words like “and” and “but”. She even goes so far as to begin a sentence with “because”, violating every rule about writing ingrained in us since the third grade. Beginning sentences with words that tend to come in the middle of a sentence calls the reader’s attention. It’s a red flag – an order requiring you to really pay attention in the next few seconds.

These blog posts seem very casual, but not quite colloquial, written in the voice of a college student giving a lecture to her peers. Holly refrains from using words or phrases that make her blog sound academic. Instead, she uses her own jargon, including words like, “kooky”, “weirdness”, and “urbane sophisticate”. I know the last term can seem a bit professional and academic, but she uses it mockingly, bringing us back to her casual style. She also uses grammatically incorrect sentences and sentence fragments, such as, “It feels real good”, and, “What a sick and pathetic display”, adding to the casualness of her writing.

Despite the laid back attitude Holly personifies, she uses descriptive phrases, such as “venom-tipped words”, “cookie-cutter bully”, and “scrappy underdog” to give the reader some substance to what might otherwise be considered a lecture about how to live your life. She creates imagery while remaining casual when she says,

“No longer is being the strange one a sentence for a lonely life with many, many cats.”

We can all visualize the stereotypical old, unmarried lady surrounded by cats in her tiny, musty home; and we can own up to the idea that we thought this lady was “strange”. Holly also writes,

“I found myself swimming upstream, often without any sort of boat, or even water wings.”

After reading the first half of this sentence, I got a feeling that Holly was saying something inspirational – like something you might hear in a sermon; but when she references water wings, I immediately pictured neon colored inflatables, causing the seriousness of this image to dissipate. Again, when she writes something that might be taken as academic or professional, she brings it back down to the college-student voice.

Lastly, Holly uses punctuation to accent her casual, non-academic speaking voice. The reader can essentially hear her speak to them when she says, “Don’t. Drink. Beer” (I envision hand gestures and a serious expression), and see her take a second to gather her thoughts when she writes ellipses in the middle of a sentence.

Holly’s confident, casual, punchy personality is consistent throughout her blog posts, as is her word-to-the-wise, lecture style of writing – in my opinion. 

A Wedding Blog?

Think Splendid is a blog dedicated to the business behind wedding and event planning. Liene Stevens, the author of this blog, runs Splendid Communications, a “digital marketing firm specialized in the wedding and event industries”. She uses this blog not only to discuss business ideas, but also to talk about people – what drives us and moves us, and what we know we are all thinking but are too afraid to vocalize. Stevens sees blogging as a form of old-fashioned conversations, as opposed to a way of keeping up with new trends in technology, and she blogs quite frequently. On average, Stevens has close to 20 blog posts per month, most with a handful of comments or reactions. Her blogs are mostly professional, detailed when discussing the business side of things, and a little less detailed when discussing personal issues. This seems to leave room for interpretation and thought, which I think her readers greatly appreciate. 

One of the more interesting blog post written by Stevens is titled, Waiting for the Rinse Cycle to Complete. In this post, she warns her audience that “social media doesn’t turn a person into a hero or a fraud; it amplifies who they already are”. Although this piece is short, taking up a mere four lines of text, each word resonates. Stevens writes that the truth about a person’s personality will come out in due time – there is no point in trying to hide it. However, we must also realize that discovering the truth will take patience. This blog post does not specifically relate to my topic, but after reading Stevens’ post I felt the need to re-evaluate the purpose of my blog. If I am going to be discussing something that I am already so passionate about, will this medium of communication really amplify my feelings and make my stories and opinions seem too over the top to my audience? I don't want to seem like I’m “making a mountain out of a molehill”. Stevens’ post reminded me that I need to keep myself in check when writing – I don’t want to come off as the “oddball, on steroids”, as one of her followers would put it.

Another one of Stevens’ posts that resonated with me is titled, Being Yourself. In this post, Stevens makes the distinction between what is means to be “different” and what it means to be “unique”. Stevens believes, “different is temporary and easy to duplicate”, whereas, “unique is you”. Others can mimic the things about you that are different, but they can never be you. After reading Stevens’ post, I reflected on my own “Hello, World” post, in which I use the words “different” and “unique” interchangeably. Though I understand her word usage argument, I think I will stick to what I wrote. The focuses of our posts are different, even though we end with the same sentiments. I use my own stories to explain why I am different (or unique, as Stevens would say) and that people who are different should be proud of what makes them different, whereas Stevens argues that everyone should aim to be unique. This post just gave me something to think about.

These blog posts, tagged as topics of “Personal Development”, represent two of many posts on Think Splendid. Though at first glance, I could not quite grasp why Stevens would blog about such issues when her site clearly deals with her wedding business. But after reading some of her blog posts, I came to the conclusion that she writes these posts to remind herself to avoid getting lost in all the hustle and bustle of the wedding industry. Although she uses specific examples that apply to her business, she writes in a way so that the reader can ignore the technicalities of her examples and make these lessons applicable to their own lives. Likewise, I want to share some of my own experiences as an Asian hula dancer who doesn’t fit in with my native Hawaiian counterparts, and I want people reading my blog to find a way to connect to my story even though they most likely won’t share my experiences.

 

Hello, World

“One of these things is not like the other. One of these things just doesn’t belong. Can you tell which thing is not like the others by the time I finish my song?” – Big Bird, Sesame Street

The creators of Sesame Street have been instilling in us an eye for picking out the oddball. By Big Bird’s command, we were obliged to identify differences, and identify them quickly, while we were still in diapers. We were tested on disparities in shape, size, color, number, and object. And what was our reward? Nothing. We were merely left with the self-admiration that came with recognizing the oddball before the music stopped and our time expired. But is Sesame Street teaching our youngsters a valuable trait? Is the ability to detect the thing that has yet to conform a necessity? It seems that Sesame Street teaches children the skill of identifying differences amongst things and people, which could lead them to conclude that being different is bad. They may develop a negative perception of things that look usual. But we must embrace what is different and not be made uncomfortable by it. We should aim to preserve that which is different instead of throwing it out.

As a mixed-breed of Asian ethnicities, I have experience feeling like “one of these things that just doesn’t belong” when I dance hula. This native Hawaiian art form has been my passion for the past fifteen years. I love using my hands, feet, and expressions to tell a story about the beautiful places, astounding events, and influential people of this isolated archipelago. Yet I am the outsider, a foreigner, a haole. Standing next to my hula sisters, I cannot help but compare my long, straight hair with their wavy locks. I cannot help but notice that my eyes turn into crescent moons on the surface of my face when I smile, while theirs remain whole and round. But I move just as gracefully as they move, I am as good a dancer as they are, and I love hula just as much as they do. The only difference: I lack Hawaiian blood and the traits that come with it. I am physically different. I am an outsider.

Amongst the other girls, I would be the object Big Bird would identify as the oddball – the one that Big Bird would point to at the end of the song and announce as the discrepancy amongst the rest. Yet, despite the uncomfortable feeling this revelation sometimes causes, I decided to stick with hula. I decided that I cannot be intimidated by my physical differences, and I cannot abandon my passion. Dancing hula is part of my identity. In that world I am unique, not just the “cookie-cutter” Asian girl (academically inclined, sweet, soft-spoken, respectful of her culture, etc.). When I dance hula, I am a foreigner amongst the natives, but I am proud.

In situations where we are uncomfortable being seen as the outsider, we must hold strong to the idea that this is, instead, an opportunity to preserve the things about us that make us unique. That is, we must ignore intimidation. This blog is for those of us who are unique, who are outsiders, and who are proud of being us. 

other blogs to check out:

http://filrabat.blogspot.com/2011/06/globalization-and-diversity.html

http://www.thinksplendid.com/2009/08/being-yourself.html

http://metaquidz.wordpress.com/2011/08/28/on-being-different/